Family Business
by 88silverkeys
Summary: A stray bullet, impeding nuptials, and loose lips lead to interesting revelations. Abby/McGee, Gibbs/DiNozzo, father!Gibbs/daughter!Abby, SLASH, HET, and a little crack.


**Another challenge, this one might border on crack!fic…just warning you.**

Abby rushed into the hospital at top speed, which was not very fast considering the height of the black platforms she was sporting. Times like these showed very obviously that the forensic team deserved badges to wave at hospital staff. But for the time being, Abby possessed something twice as valuable to get her past the 'I'm-sorry-miss-but-only-authorized-members-of-Mister-Gibbs'-team-can-visit-him-right-now' squad. She had McGee and his shiny badge and her equally shiny engagement ring to prove her necessity to stay with the team in the hospital. And by team, Abby was simply with McGee to visit the boss because Ziva and Ducky were back at the scene because someone had to process it and Tony had split when they entered the hospital in the direction of the cafeteria whilst furiously wiping at his tears.

The room was quite, only the sound of the beeping machines when McGee and Abby entered. Pushing past the flimsy curtain, they came across to Gibbs: wired to all the machines and making a face like the simple IVs were a kind of straightjacket.

"Gibbs! Oh my _God_, I was so worried. You've given me a heart attack, how could you do this to us? Always being the hero, jumping in the line of fire, giving everyone a break but yourself—"

"Abby…"

"I'm sorry, you just scared me. You could have _died_ or at the very least been unable to walk me down the aisle next month. I suppose its good it was a thru-and-thru in the arm, but still…"

McGee looked up from where he had been fiddling with his sleeve, afraid of the confrontation Abby was trying with Gibbs. But he was surprised at her words on the wedding.

"Wait, Abby. I thought your father would be back from his trip to the Himalayas by then?" Gibbs looked up and McGee and squinted in his most intimidating manner. "Not that I wouldn't love you to be involved, especially if it is what Abby wants. You're more than welcome, of course, but not that you need my permission obviously! I just thought that you wanted your dad to do it, just traditionally…?"

Abby grimaced and looked at Gibbs, giving him an equally pleading and guilty look. "Well, McGee, remember when I told you that Dad and you couldn't meet because he was doing photography for National Geographic abroad all the time?"

"Yes…"

"Okay, well. Good memory, Tim. Um, I lied."

"…so he isn't in the Himalayas?"

"Not exactly."

"Alright, Abby, where is he?"

"In the hospital."

McGee suddenly felt his stomach drop. "Oh God, Abby. What's wrong with him? What happened? I'm so sorry, I wish you'd told me, oh man…"

Abby glanced at Gibbs who looked surprisingly amused and Tim could see them fighting furiously in sign language. Finally Abby sighed and turned back to Tim with pursed lips and a decidedly nervous expression. "Alright, Tim. He technically is in a hospital, but don't worry because it was just a stray bullet in the arm."

"Like Gibbs?' McGee asked slowly.

"Oh for God's sake, Abby, you cannot marry him if he is going to be this dense. McGee, what the hell kind of investigator are you?"

McGee just gave him a black stare.

"He's my dad." Abby leaned over helpfully to whisper.

"Oh shit. Oh my…you aren't serious?"

"Kind of…yeah, I am." To make the point, or perhaps as a subconscious gesture, Abby moved towards Gibbs and grabbed his hand. "Daddy dearest here and I thought keeping this thing quite for a while when I got started at work would be good and then "a while" turned into some kind of permanent secret thing. So, surprise!"

"Jesus, Abbs, I'm…I'm going to marry…" Tony took that moment to enter the room with red rimmed eyes and a cup of coffee. "The boss' daughter…"

And to enter with an immediate distraction from the fact that Gibbs was in a hospital bed was just so lucky for Tony. "2003 flick directed by David Zucker, better known for his work with the classic Airplane!, but still a passable film—shallow and short—but it did surprisingly well." A deep breath. "So, boss, I brought you coffee. Obviously the doctors wouldn't be big fans, so keep it quite…whoa, what the hell did I just walk in to?" Tony stopped as his hand was outstretched towards Gibbs's with the coffee.

Gibbs took the opportunity to grab the drink quickly before Tony dropped it when he heard from McGee who was still stuttering and ready to reach another revelation with the news.

"No, Tony. Gibbs, he's Abby's…oh God, they're family. He's Abby's father. Oh jeez."

Tony prepared to laugh but saw the awkward blush and giggle from Abby and the frustrated grunt from Gibbs. "Wait, what?!? No…but, Gibbs are you hallucinating? What drugs are you on? They're airborne, aren't they? You've all got it…" He pulled his shirt collar towards his mouth to filter his breathing.

"No, Tony, everyone's fine. Gibbs really is my dad, so he's going to walk me down the aisle." Abby was bouncing back and forth on her toes, McGee was opening and closing his mouth like a dying fish, and Gibbs was watching Tony very carefully.

Tony stopped and glanced between everyone. "How long have you been her father?"

Gibbs threw his hands in the air. "Get over here so I can slap you, DiNozzo."

"How could you not tell me? I mean, we've been toget--, I just mean we've been working together for years and all this time you couldn't tell your lov--, your loyal team about this?!?"

"Well, Abby didn't tell her partner, why should I?" Gibbs scowled.

There was an awkward silence as McGee pieced together this latest comment. "Wait, boss? I'm not Abby's partner, she isn't a field agent…oh no, you're talking about like romantic. No you're Gibbs. I just…"

"Oh nice work, boss. Way to spread the sunshine, just great. You tell me to not mention the whole "I'm sleeping with the boss" and you blurt it out. And of course I can't be pissed for long because you're lying in a damn hospital!"

Abby was practically quivering with excitement. "Oh, I'm so glad you finally told Tim. See, Dad? I _told_ you telling the truth was healthier. This is good, very cathartic. It is all out in the open now. So now I can call you Dad and use lots of sexual innuendos about you and Tony, this is so much better!"

"Abby, you aren't saying a damn word about Tony and I to anyone else. McGee, get over it. Tony, yes, I probably should have said something but fatherhood didn't seem like appropriate pillow talk."

McGee was flabbergasted, that was the only way to describe it. Tony wasn't far behind. "You're her father, Gibss? I've been talking about our sex life to _your daughter_!?!? Oh, God…I feel so unclean."

"Wait. You're going to be my father-in-law next month, oh man. Abby, I'm marrying a Gibbs and no one told me! Why the hell not?"

"More importantly, McGee and I attracted to the same family tree, Jesus! I really feel like someone _should have told me_!"

Abby and Gibbs exchanged a glance and quickly began to sign to each other as Tony and McGee took turns slowly realizing all the implications of the new information. When they ran out of connections to make and the silence overtook the room, Abby gave a huge smile and laughed. "I just thought of something really funny. Since Timmy and I are getting married and Dad and Tony are together, practically married after 3 years, then Tony—you're gonna be like Timmy's mother-in-law! Isn't this fun, right?"

It was hard to tell who wanted to headslap Abby the most.

**Alright, another challenge from Elizabeth which had to include established relationships for Tony/Gibbs and Tim/Abby, plus Tony and McGee finding out that Gibbs is Abby' father. **

**Review please, tell me what you think of how it turned out!**


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